With Christmas fast approaching I think often of Mike. We were fortunate to have shared many happy holidays with Sarah and Mike and I have lots of wonderful memories.
As Catherine mentioned in her blog Mike did have a different approach to Christmas than we do (or should I say I do). Whereas I like to shop and buy a number of gifts for each person Sarah told me early on that I was to buy just one gift for Mike and that the one gift should be something low-key. I was worried Mike would feel leftout without presents to open but I needn't have. He enjoyed sitting back and observing our Christmas morning ritual.
And thinking about Christmas morning puts me in mind of coffee. I knew Mike was particular about his coffee and I wanted to find a coffee that satisfied his discriminating taste. Each year I would try one or another and Mike would contentedly drink whtever I was brewing. But one year Mike and Sarah brought coffee in a little brown bag as a contribution to the visit - the Italian French blend from Cookes - very generous , so I thought! It was a win win - Mike drank the coffee he preferred and I was introduced to a rich blend that I found very delicious.
And then there was the bacon. When Mike and Sarah and Catherine and Eliot stayed over I would always add bacon to the shopping list. I thought it would be a special treat for all of us in the morning. So this became our visitor's tradition - the morning beginning with bacon and eggs. Sarah told me later that Mike thought that bacon was our everyday tradition. I'm sure that he was concerned about our high cholesterol intake.
One thing I learned about Mike was that he took his time when it came to eating. At first I worried that Mike wasn't enjoying his dinner because he ate as slowly as he did. But I relaxed once I came to appreciate that Mike was simply savouring the experience.
Mike knew how to get comfy. The picture below that I have is a bit fuzzy but I think it epitomizes Mike's approach - there he is in flannel pants, cozy blanket , reading the Globe and Mail. It was so wonderful that Mike felt right at home. And then later in the day it might be a snooze on the green corduroy couch.
As Catherine mentioned in her blog Mike did have a different approach to Christmas than we do (or should I say I do). Whereas I like to shop and buy a number of gifts for each person Sarah told me early on that I was to buy just one gift for Mike and that the one gift should be something low-key. I was worried Mike would feel leftout without presents to open but I needn't have. He enjoyed sitting back and observing our Christmas morning ritual.
And thinking about Christmas morning puts me in mind of coffee. I knew Mike was particular about his coffee and I wanted to find a coffee that satisfied his discriminating taste. Each year I would try one or another and Mike would contentedly drink whtever I was brewing. But one year Mike and Sarah brought coffee in a little brown bag as a contribution to the visit - the Italian French blend from Cookes - very generous , so I thought! It was a win win - Mike drank the coffee he preferred and I was introduced to a rich blend that I found very delicious.
And then there was the bacon. When Mike and Sarah and Catherine and Eliot stayed over I would always add bacon to the shopping list. I thought it would be a special treat for all of us in the morning. So this became our visitor's tradition - the morning beginning with bacon and eggs. Sarah told me later that Mike thought that bacon was our everyday tradition. I'm sure that he was concerned about our high cholesterol intake.
One thing I learned about Mike was that he took his time when it came to eating. At first I worried that Mike wasn't enjoying his dinner because he ate as slowly as he did. But I relaxed once I came to appreciate that Mike was simply savouring the experience.
Mike knew how to get comfy. The picture below that I have is a bit fuzzy but I think it epitomizes Mike's approach - there he is in flannel pants, cozy blanket , reading the Globe and Mail. It was so wonderful that Mike felt right at home. And then later in the day it might be a snooze on the green corduroy couch.
I remember Christmases in Kingston sitting around the Frymire table. There was always lots of laughter and way too much food.
I remember the Christmas that would be Mike's last. The late night gift wrapping, the special letter written, the satisfaction Mike felt that the new dining room table was big enough to accomodate us all.
And so this year as we once again prepare for Christmas I feel the loss of Mike. And that helps me come to a little bit of an understanding of the deeply felt grief that Sarah, Joan and Dennis, Alison and Matthew are experiencing. As I watch Sarah cut down the tree, take the children to see Santa, put up decorations I marvel how Sarah lives with grief - and with joy as she watches Lucas and Emily and their excitement as Christmas approaches.
Much love Carolyn
A wonderful post Carolyn. By the end, I was reading through a veil of tears.... as is often the case.
ReplyDeleteWith love, Dennis